26 December 2002 - 7:22 pm
What I�ve learned over the last four years
� �My grandkids are cuter then yours� *is* a justifiable reason to start a riot.
� It�s never a good idea to sleep with her boyfriend. Even if it�s his idea. Even if she�s ok with it. Never.
� I look good with baby-ducky-yellow hair.
� I look better bald.
� So I fired off two warning shots � into his head!
� Nothing�s as exciting as getting a blue thumbprint on the top of your head.
� If he�s rude to your friends, he needs to go.
� I can never listen to pigeons without laughing.
� The kitchen floor is the most comfortable place in the apartment. Especially when you�re drunk.
� Comfortable couches have their own gravitational pull.
� You�d be surprised where Hooters cards will turn up.
� Friends don�t let friends drink and perform magic. (4 glasses!)
� Nothing makes a room as exciting and fun as a glow-in-the-dark Star Wars battle.
� You da God!
� The �real� journal was in my trunk.
� He gives good head because he can suck his own dick. Duh.
� Always make sure your flash works.
� SOUP!
� The more ghetto the place, the better the food.
� A deer-in-the-headlights look is NOT the proper response to �Are you on drugs?�
� Cool.
� �I LIKE BLUE TOAST!�
� Hearts.
� Moto to the power of Moto to the power of Moto.
� Always keep a straight face when your friends are telling a secret.
� This one time at band camp, that�s not a yogurt stain on the couch.
� �Do you need help?� is the #1 trigger for a total emotional meltdown. Just so you know.
� I�m much prettier than the other girls.
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